Tuesday, March 16, 2010

How to Live a Magical Life: Stop Being a Control Freak

I bet you are a control freak, at least in some areas of your life, even if you don't admit it to yourself. That's all right. I think we're all control freaks.

My wife calls me a "just so guy," because there are certain areas of my life (like my cigars) where things have to be "just so" or I pout.

So we are all control freaks in some way or other, and that's fine because it helps us feel in control of something, especially when other factors in our lives (like the economy) seem to be spinning out of control.

Too Much Control Leads to Too Little Magic
But, being too much of a control freak can really get in the way of living a magical life. Trying to control events all the time keeps the magic from happening because magic mostly happens when you're not looking.

Personally, I feel that phrases like "a watched pot never boils" were created to help us control freaks who so badly want to live magical lives, but just can't seem to get there. That's 'cause we are trying to control the process.

So how do you live a magical life if you are a control freak? Give it up already!

Three Magical Rituals to Help Control Freaks Let Go
Control freaks have such a hard time letting go of stuff that they literally leave claw marks all over their lives. I ask you, how can magic operate in a space filled with claw marks? It can't. So ... to help control freaks unclench a bit, here are some great magic rituals that will help anyone let go so the magic can happen.

Magic Ritual #1: The Coin Toss
People have been flipping coins since the dawn of, well, coins to determine the outcome of certain events. For control freaks, using a coin toss to make a decision is like walking out in front of a beer truck--a guaranteed disaster. Only the coin toss isn't a disaster, it's a great way to let go of control and let magic take you for a little ride.

The next time you have a big decision come up, instead of weighing all the pros and cons and trying to make the decision based on logic or control or whatever other mental stuff is running around your brain, whip out a coin and make the decision based on the coin toss. Decide ahead of time the meaning of both "heads" and "tails." Then flip it!

Whatever the coin tells you, follow that decision ... immediately. Do not pause for consideration, do not pass "Go," and do not collect $200. Just do it.

It may sound crazy, but the universe will reward you with some pretty big magic if you can manage to follow through on this. Why? Because by letting go you allow the Universe to do for you what you cannot do for yourself. You open up space for the magic to appear. You are allowing the magic to lead you where you have always wanted to go ... only you couldn't figure out how to get there. It's one darn simple magical ritual that will help you lead a magical life and teach you to let go.

Magic Ritual #2: The Three Day Test
This ritual is another oldie-but-goodie. Actually, most of these rituals are quite old and date back to tribal times. In any case, this one's simple, too. When faced with a decision that you can't make, use the three day test.

To start the ritual, ask the question aloud to the Universe. Then, for the next three days, don't even think about the question. Don't let your mind touch the topic. Don't talk about the question to a single person. Leave it alone. This is the hardest part of the ritual.

At the end of the third day, ask your question aloud to the Universe again. Then, wait for the answer. Go with the first answer that comes to you. As with the coin toss, do not stop to think it over, ponder it, or otherwise mess with the process. Follow the guidance from the Universe and see what magic unfolds for you. Beyond that, actively look for signs of magic. They will be there ... you just have to be on the lookout for them. They will amaze you.

Magic Ritual #3: Decide That All Decisions are Right
This magic ritual is more of a meditation. It can be done as a silent sitting meditation, or as a more active writing meditation. It is very simple. Before you make a final decision about something, stop and do this meditation. Use this mantra:

"All decisions are right. All decisions will lead me to where I want to be. There are no wrong decisions."

You can either repeat this manta silently during a quiet sitting meditation, or write it forty times in a row during a more active meditation. I personally find that the act of writing does something magic to me. It shifts my place of being from mundane to magical, so I often tend to write mantras rather than repeating them silently to myself.

Once you have completed the meditation, go ahead and make your decision ... and then run with it. You can use either of the two magic rituals above if you have difficulty making your decision. If you encounter doubt after you have made your decision, or at any point along the journey, then repeat the meditation.

Magic Rituals Are Simple
See how simple all of these rituals are? I like simple magic because it's fast, immediate, and is an act of power. Any act of power restores personal power. When you are operating from a space of personal power, you can't make a wrong decision. You really can't. Plus, you will feel so positive that any decision is bound to be successful.

For more simple magic rituals, check out our magic rituals ebooks.

Now it's up to you. Try these magic rituals and let the magic guide you. Trust the process. Trust the magic.

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Photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/candees/ / CC BY 2.0

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